About Me

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I love Jesus. I love my family. I love photography. I love books. I love thinking. Probably in that order. I have a wonderful husband, five beautiful daughters, a house, and a camera. I enjoy spending time talking to my husband, playing with my girls, redecorating my house and shooting things with my camera. In my spare time, I sleep.

Monday, June 1, 2009

My Social Struggle

I am not a social person. I like people but I prefer my contact with them to be from a distance or on my own terms. I am private. I like my own space. I like being on my own time. When I am in a social situation, I do not feel free to be who I am and I like being free. I am so guarded when it comes to my emotions that it makes being around people for too long, quite stressful. I prefer having a few close friends, a few casual once-in-a-while friends, and letting everyone else remain in the acquaintance/stranger category.

My question is this--am I wrong? Is this something that I should feel is a flaw in myself and work to change or is this a part of my make-up that I am fighting against every time a "social" person thinks there is something wrong with me for not wanting to spend time with them on Friday night and I end up feeling bad about myself? I want them to just understand that it is nothing personal against them...I'm like this with anybody. I'm content to stay at home with my family and not have many friends. Is this just me being selfish or is okay for me to be content with this aspect of myself?

And when I ask this question, I feel that the only Person really qualified to answer is God so, "Heavenly Father, please help me find the answer."

1 comment:

Ginger said...

Since we are so much alike I can identify with your social struggle, however if you and I didn't want to be in uncomfortable social situations we should have never gotten married and had kids because like it or not we get thrown into those situations all the time. We were spoiled and never had to do things we didn't want to do and now things can't be the way WE want all the time. Every family does things differently - right or wrong it's just different.

The thing is -- people remember you for how you made them feel and all the talk in the world about being a Christian and loving Jesus doesn't mean anything if you act like you don't like someone and wish they weren't there. I Peter 4:8 and 9 says "And above all things have fervent charity among yourselves...9 Use hospitality one to another without grudging."

I wish I could be more like my mom when it comes to being hospitable, or even my husband for that matter.
Love you,